Wednesday, July 20, 2011

there is a time for blogging ...

It is good to run in the cool of the evening.  and to let your body choose the longer of two routes because your knees aren't hurting and there's no pain in your chest.  It is good to live in the darkening day and to breathe and to feel good about what you can do.  I'm still running.

My face sweats more than the rest of my body put together, by the way.  It's ridiculous.  I don't know how or why that works, but there you have it.  Weird.

I am currently right smack dab in the middle of life.  Marriage is a lot of work.  So is actual work.  My job is great, but I don't always have the wealth of patience for tiny children that I should.  Also, you have to spend a lot of time with your husband to really maintain a good relationship.  Who knew?

I'm also taking dance classes.  I would like to be able to do the splits one way or another by the end of the summer.  In the meantime, I'm relearning leaps and dancing to Katy Perry. :)

Sometime soon soon soon, I want to sit outside a Portland bar with a beer and a friend.  It should be warm by not hot and I will have biked there.  We'll both be done with work for the week and we'll understand one another.  We'll talk and laugh and be happy to be near one another.  This is something that will probably actually happen to me.  It is perfection and it exists from time to time in my life.

What the hell?  How did I wake up with a job and a husband and a life that I enjoy with a body that can run in the evening?  I've been biking to work too.  And it's summer.  I've promised myself that I'm going to get shitfaced at least once before September.  I don't do it often enough.  I can't grow up too fast you know.  There is something so freeing about drinking more than you should and then leaning on someone you trust who will get you back to your bed in one piece.

Speaking of which, goodnight.

Sunday, July 10, 2011

postscript

I really do have bigger things happening in my mind and in my life than Baby Caroline.  I just don't know how to write about them.

Baby Caroline

Kiersten and I babysat Baby Caroline tonight.  Just her.  Brother and Sister were on dates with the parents and Caroline was all on her own with us.  She cried for a straight hour and a half.  You could tell that she was just tired and confused and unhappy and unsettled with us. Which was understandable.  Still hard to deal with, but understandable nonetheless.

Babies are nice.  You can say anything you want around them.  I like to sing songs and say silly words in a high voice to babies when they're happy.  But they are a little too much for me when they're not, which can be often.  The constant loud crying in my ear is tricky.  I sat Caroline in her high chair while Kierst and I made dinner and she cried the whole time.  It was hard to think or have a conversation that wasn't about Baby Caroline.

She was happy later, but I was still glad to leave her.

My house is so peaceful.  There are no babies here.